A list

I realize that almost all my posts have been tributes to people I admire or assaults on people I can't stand, so I decided that this I will make the once and for all list of the 50 greatest and worst men of all time. While this may seem slightly sexist, I am under no ability to rank women whatsover. As a man, this is a list of 50 men who have helped shape the kind of man I am today. This means that Ronnie Spector, Tina Turner, Bette Davis , Mother Teresa, Mary Queen of Scots, Meryl Streep, the goddess Parvati, and many other esteemed women may not make the good, while Oprah, Anne Frank, Yoko Ono, Patti LaBelle, and others of lesser esteem may not make the bad. Another list may be in order soon. Enjoy.

50 Greatest
To be among the 50 greatest people of all time there are no definite criteria. There must be a certain philosophical beauty to your life, and that can be interpreted many different ways. In most cases I will try to avoid fictional characters. For some great characters I'll have an actor who played them or a writer who wrote them. In rare exceptions (Lester Burnham, William Shatner, Omar Little) I have the fictional character himself. Being that this is not a list of the number of post offices owned, Johnny Mathis is not on the list.

1. Keith Richards
2. Peter O'Toole
3. Malcolm McDowell
4. Bob Dylan
5. Wilt Chamberlain
6. Jimi Hendrix
7. Ike Turner
8. Buddha
9. Lou Reed
10. Sam Cooke
11. Shakespeare
12. William Shatner
13. Lester Burnham
14. Muhammad
15. Marlon Brando
16. Buddy Holly
17. Seth McFarlane
18. John Lennon (B.Y.: Before Yoko)
19. Hugh Hefner
20. Huey Newton
21. Laurence Olivier
22. David Crosby
23. Phil Spector
24. the Marquis de Sade
25. Emperor Caligula
26. Maximilien Robespierre
27. Roger Moore
28. Liberace
29. Morgan Freeman
30. Jesus
31. Omar Little
32. Samuel L. Jackson
33. Beat Writers
34. Alfred Hitchcock
35. Quentin Tarantino
36. Every member of the Zombies
37. Muddy Waters
38. Jack Nicholson
39. Dennis Hopper
40. Andy Warhol
41. Ivan the Terrible
42. Henry VIII of England
43. Jim Morrison
44. Moses
45. Triumph the Insult Dog
46. Trey Parker and Matt Stone
47. Roger McGuinn
48. Jimmy Page
49. Original SNL Cast
50. Tony Chang

50 Worst
Same criteria as above: a philosophy so offensive to me that it makes me puke my fucking guts out every time I think of them. Some of these people (Bono, Brian Wilson, Brett Favre, Gandhi) have done great things, but have such a cringe worthy countenance that makes them unbearable. On those people I have a few comments respectively: South Park was right; a few great songs and mental illness doesn't make you that cool; I don't care if you might well be the greatest quarterback of all time, the offseason shouldn't be a retirement soap opera; wear clothes.

1. Ian Curtis
2. Michael Cera
3. Anyone elected in the state of South Carolina
4. Hitler
5. Steve Jobs
6. Sting
7. Fox News Staff (including Karl Rove)
8. Morrissey
9. Bono
10. John Lennon (AY)
11. Evan McGowan
12. Stalin
13. John Mayer
14. Nicolas Cage
15. Shia LaBeouf
16. Will Ferrell
17. M. Night Shaymaylan
18. Dan Simon
19. Jimmy Kimmel
20. Tom Cruise
21. Pol Pot
22. Republican Party elected officials since Lincoln other than T. Roosevelt (Bush I and II, Reagan, Cheney, Tom DeLay, Mitt Romney, Joe McCarthy, Nixon)
23. Thom Yorke
24. the Gallagher Brothers
25. "the Good" Roman Emperors
26. JJ Redick
27. Idi Amin
28. Coldplay
29. Kanye
30. Kim Jong Il
31. Gandhi
32. Brett Favre
33. Lady Gaga
34. Zach Braff off camera
35. K-Fed
36. Dean Martin
37. Nickelback
38. Bob Hope
39. Any writer for Pitchfork
40. Jason Mraz
41. Stevie Ray Vaughan
42. Pat Robertson
43. Carlos Mencia
44. Drake
45. Toby Keith
46. Bin Laden
47. Ted Nugent
48. Roy Cohn
49. Roger Waters 1980-the present
50. Vince Vaughan